The other one

I could be someone
if only I had been born
in another skin.

One which did not require
as much nurturing
or energy.

A girl who was
all those incredible things
to everyone.

To anyone.

Just passing

Passing time
on your way through
until the other
finds you
wanton
expecting
adored
to the point where I
cannot compete.

A point in time.

Who passed.

Then how come
I have never moved?

From where you are

Drip drop.

Drip drop.

With each ebb and flow

I lose control

Smoothed around the circumference,

Eroded from the middle.

Drip drop.

Drip drop

Drop drip.

Imperceptibly erased from within.

I only wanted

To numb the pain.

Drip.

Drop.

Drip.           Drop.

Drip.

Hairline Fracture

So I hid my brokenness.

But kept on breaking.

Over again.
Over again.

It kept on.

Breaking.

I kept breaking.

Over.
Over.

But I hid my brokenness.
So you wouldn't see.

Mind

I’m slightly crazy

or is that slightly mad

mad about you

you who control

control all my thoughts

thoughts of a different life

life beyond fear

fear of rejection

rejection of me

me who knows nothing

nothing is clear

clear away depict

depict within myself

myself alone

alone amongst the tears

tears that fall

fall away from a world

world in chaos

chaos travels my mind,

I mind.

Catholic girl

With my guilt I should be catholic

or at least down on my knees and praying.

Cause I’ve got bucket loads of the stuff,

over flowing, over whelmed and consumed.

Yes the priest would be proud.

And are you, my vengeful God,

pleased to watch my daily struggle.

Are you pleased?

Are you proud?

Just Me

Is it just me?

Is it just me?

Maybe it’s just me?

Sometimes I wonder

if it’s just me.

Not you.

Not you and me.

Just me.

Just me alone.

Me on my own.

What if it’s just me?

And you’re not here.

And they’re not here.

Only me.

Just me.

Is it just me?

I don’t want it to be

just me.